Being Waterproof ((11:11 on 11/11/2014))

Why I continue to do the wrong thing again & again?Why?I never learn... like America.Waste time.Be a Lazy Ass Bitch.Eat not enough & too much.Be ossessed.Go to sleep early after I read some pages of Moz's Autobiography,turn off the light but the mind is still on,wait HOURS for Morpheus.Drink water & pray that you will not need to go to the bathroom or all the efforts to fall asleep will be useless!Die for a couple of hours.Obviously wake up super early with M. but remain to swim between the hot blanket until Morpheus comes back again.I MUST to stop this shit!I HATE waste timelike this! I HATE be so stupid!I wake up & lunch.Mushrooms (+magical crouton)+1 chocolate & caramel biscuit & a surplus of peanut butter (just one fat girl!!).I feel so Out.Forceless... Hopeless.Again.I need something beautiful in my life... something that cheer me up after so bad moments.& NO,I'm not talking about Reedus.He is not enough because he is Impossible.Sigh.I check emails.Something not clear.I'll ask.I register into another job site.I need to go out.Make up.I hate my skin.I would to change it like a snake.A new fur friend near home.DARYL the squirrel.I try to not scare him.I hope to see him again.A little rain but 'sticazzi.I walk listen to music.It is like I'm running... I don't know why.Maybe my body is scared by the rain.I arrive to Brick Lane, no Salmon+Cheese for me.I walk to Shoredicth.I find some interesting stuff.I guess it is a sign... It is still raining.A little less.New Street Art.The smell of the fresh paint.Photos.I return back to Roman Road.Now I look 1000 times in every direction before go through.Tesco.Yogurt,seeded bread,freeze drieds.These will be my meals for next days.A Leprechaun cashier asks How was my day.I just say Fine.Thank you.It's not raining anymore.Obviously I forgot something.I should make a fucking LIST!A good surprise.I have to ask for it ASAP even if it is on 28th november.I arrive to home.Damn,I hope I didn't screw up.I find a super old photo of Reedus made by Geoff Moore on Instagram.So,I looked to ALL his photos.I just love him.Thank you Reedus.The phone is almost dead.So,you're saying to me that if I feel alone & sad I can't go to Lady Dinah's Cat Emporium because I didn't book?WTF!M.is at home.Dinner with 1 seeded bread sandwich withhumus+4 pieces of sushi & another seeded bread sandwich with humus+lattuce+6 tomatoes.11:11.I love it.Tomorrow I don't really know what will happen.I HATE it because I can prepare myself in the perfect way possible BUT I will not have the complete control of the events.It is so frustrating...

PS: yesterday I said that I shoudln't drink tea before go to sleep because probably it is for it that I can't sleep... Guess what I'm doing now...